"Screw you guys, I´m going home"

 Hi!
For the longest time, I had problem with saying No. Many people do. It´s worst for me when it comes to parties and other actions, not just because I´m people pleaser and usually an organizer of those night outs, but also because I hate being alone and the feeling that I will miss something eats me from inside. Yeah, with the way I mix jokes with my existential dread, I should star in a French new wave movie ☆ ～('▽^人).
Also, believe it or not, I used to not be asked out so often, so when a possible plan came up, I just rolled with it, even if I didn´t like the people or club involved. If you have a similar problem, believe me, it got better - first of all, I started to actually like some of those people. 
Of course, it took some time - like two months of getting drunk twice a weekend. Looking back, was it really worth it? Maybe, they are fun to be around. It depends on what you are looking for in life. It also showed me that I can be a little judgy - not every "jock" is a dick. Sometimes us alternative people can be mean to normies, but I´m not surprised. It comes from experience and it takes many others to unlearn.
Some of them however still seem like assholes, but sometimes, you have to face little inconveniences.
And second, I got to a better place. I used to have good friends who never went out (or couldn´t), and shallow-level drinking buddies that liked partying - now, since I´m in college, I have both of those groups and to top it off, good friends who are sociable. 
I´m going out almost every single night out, and I fancy those when I can study and sleep, so I don´t really feel like I´m missing something. Maybe it´s because I´m kinda done with love and crushes right now, but that´s another story. 
So yeah. I feel like I can just go home. But can I say it?

You know, I´m down for everything. As long as person inviting me is enthusiastic enough, I can go everywhere. After all, this is how I make friends. It doesn´t take that much to convince me when I don´t want to do something, too. 

It will be fun!
Oh, come on, we need you here!
That person you liked is coming ;).
Etc.

I´m weak, but I´m slowly getting better. This is actually reason why I´m never coming to a club just in two people - you can leave your friend alone there, even if they just got in with someone and you just sit there, tired and trying to get away from old perverts. (That was not a fun night.)
It culminated in me, yesterday, after all those boring nights where I hated myself for not staying home, saying simple words: "I´m not going with you guys, I´m too poor and tired."
We were already at house party and I knew it was not going to get better than that. I had fun, met people I didn´t see for like a month, and looked good, because I still came in my witch costume. I planned to leave my friends before the club and then go home, get some sleep, as I´m going to club today too, and I was already in other ones twice this week. 
I could pass this one. 
As the night got longer and people progressively drunker, the idea of me having a calm night got to their nerves. In a friendly manner, they started to argue with me, but I was adamant.
So then we got out of the house, helped Michal (owner of that apartment) throw away liquor bottles, and I found my keys. I was ready to stand my ground. 
My sister did however not. She pretty much blacked out exactly at that moment. This is how my character growth moment turned into a rescue mission - we had to get her home.
For some reasons, while the rest of the group took taxi, I, the only person with keys, had to walk home. This walk home had side quests, too, like helping a drunk girl find her boyfriend, but by the end, I got there. 
We put my sister to bed, which woke up our mom, and she wasn´t angry. Just scared. When I did this, she was pissed for weeks, but that was almost a year ago, so maybe she just accepted that we will do what we saw our dad do. 
She is fine, just embarrassed now, and I feel emptiness. I will have to wait for my big, assertive motive till the next time.

Lolita Vampire

 Hi!
Bela Lugosi is not dead today, in fact, he was just born! This motivated me to change my MCR shirt to a dramatic dress because I think this is one of the best days to go full-on goth. After all, how many of us learned about goth through Bauhaus?
Of course, Bela Lugosi is Dead is not the only reason why I think of him as kind of a goth icon. He lived dramatic life dedicated to his image, which was quite macabre, and film he starred in helped to shape the visuals of subculture so many of us love, at least in my opinion. Old horrors and German expressionist cinema are both very inspiring in terms of style, and they are going to pop up in my head instantly, because I want to think, how would I dress up as a lolita vampire?

Or would be, in my case

This is just for fun, there is no such substyle.

First of all, I don´t think vampire means just gothic lolita. I think there would a strike of classic too, as vampires are traditionally very old creatures. Imagine having to go through so many trends and then finding out that there is fashion inspired by clothing you wore when you were young. I think that more nostalgic vampires would be enamored. 
Of course, this means everyone would be drawn to to different aspect of the fashion, but I think there are some things universally seen as antique, such as gobelins, bustles and bonnets. I think those litttle all over florals would be adorable, ideally blue/white on black and while not really vampiric, it´s interesting contrast since flowers usually represent life. 

Kinda old school, too, but it´s fitting 

As a vampire, I would leave the colours less saturated, with black and sax being my best friends. Motie blue and red would be my accent colours too, and as base, I think beige would be great. For vampires as a whole though, I think I would use white. 
Blackxwhite is iconic for vampires and no one can prove me otherwise :D. I think this is the weirdest thing about Twilight for me. Outside of Alice, all of those vampires just dressed as normal rich kids. Where is any fun in this? 
(Well, I shouldn´t be surprised, maybe should even feel a little relief, considering what outfits Bella is put into in the books...)
What makes or breaks a good vampire outfit for me is material. Velvet is the choice, but even undead needs something more practical. By that, I mean brocade, silk, and high-quality cotton. I have no problem with polyester, but it has no place in this discussion. It seems too modern and not rich enough. Honestly, I can´t imagine even non-lolita vampires in worse quality fabrics. Can you picture one of them in Shein/H&M/etc.?  

Link

On the other hand, I don´t want to exclude prints. As shown in What We Do in Shadows, even for vampires, personal style is important. I loved that so much about he show! And I like print here and there too. And since I want to believe that I would loaded as a vamp, I would go for Moitie.
After all, in a world when I got the undead pass, Mana would probably be affiliated too :D.

Link

I like that second coord is cuter, I don´t want everything to be sophisticated and I just like this dress so much. Also, it´s Alice and the Pirates, but I love it so much I had to include it :D.

Blouses should be as ruffly as possible, with bell sleeves. I own one just like this from Bodyline, but honestly, I don´t like the fabric too much. 

As for headwear, bonnets. Of course. Sometimes giant headdresses loaded with ruffles and lace or hats. Big, Edwardian hats. I´m probably too biased by Claudia from Interview with a Vampire though. I don´t like long hair on me, so I would work with my short/medium cut, but I think this style looks amazing with very long locks. 
Other than that, I would basically live in capes. Not just flowing dramatic ones, but lacy, cute ones too. I wish I could get my hands on one, not only because of my vampiric obsession, but also because they were neat in Gossip Girl and they remind me of 1960s, one of my favorite decades when it comes to fashion/pop culture.
 

Vampire Standing Collar Cape by Marble

Shoes should have their own article and I´m running out of time, so bye!
What would you wear as a vampire?

Lolita Coord, Kind Of

Hi!
I used to wear lolita kind of regularly in high school. It was an art school, so I wasn´t even the most extra kid in most cases, and my classmates and teachers complimented it. As I didn´t have a comm, it felt nice to have some place to wear lolita to. 
One day, I will share those coords, I think I evolved along the way :D.
I knew I wouldn´t be so comfortable wearing EGL in college. Most people live in sweaters/jackets here, so I stand out even in my regular clothing :D. Still, I wouldn´t want those pricy dresses just sitting in my drawer. There are meet-ups in Olomouc, but so far, I have always had some other plans :/. Hopefully, I will make it next time. 

But for now, I wore this really toned-down "lolita" to the morning lecture.
It doesn´t have the poof, but it has the spirit! (Fine, I totally cheated, this is more of vintage-y not even casual lolita/otome outfit.)

Happily, we have nice collective in my Archaeology class, and seemingly no one really cares about things like clothes. I might be the most superficial person in the room in this regard, but I really enjoy feeling pretty. 
I wish I had put something on my head, but I didn´t really have anything casual and fitting at the time. That has changed since, I crocheted a headdress :D. I will show you next time.

 I´m still figuring out angles and poses in my dorm :D.

Coord rundown

JSK - An Another Angelus

Cutsew - Gate

Cardigan - H&M

Shoes - ???
Necklace - Handmade

Right now, I´m enjoying my last day at home. I´m coming back to Olomouc tomorrow, and I will have my first full length shift in a sports bar. I used to work in a pub/bistro so hopefully, I will remember some of it :D.
Today, I will have to finish my Film Studies homework and then I will meet with friends I haven´t seen for a long time (only a few weeks, but I missed them). 
Have nice day, too! 
Bye

Tiny Haul

Hi!

I tend to find weekends on dorms a little bit boring, because all of my friends are going home every week. I´m coming back to my old folks bi-weekly, so this leaves me a lot of time. 
This is how I figured out what other college students do and I have totally forgotten about - studying. I spent last three weeks partying and going out, so I didn´t even mind doing something actually useful. 
But nobody can spend three days with nose in recomended literature and presentations, at least not without sacrifacing their own sanity, so I went out shopping. There a lot of shopping centres in Olomouc, at least four I think, so I didn´t get bored.

I bought this shirt from Gate. I actually saw it some months ago, but then it got sold out, so imagine my surprise when I found it here in sales.
I really like the texture, it´s very comfy, and I´m sucker for big collars. Also, the lace is floral, which is a nice detail. I feel like this will make a cute cutsew :). 

Honestly, I don´t care so much for Halloween as an actual holiday, but I love the fact there are so many parties, TV finally broadcasts some horrors and the general aestetic. If I will manage to find a job, I will definitelly buy more, not just from Sinsay. I want to get sceleton tighs as soon as possible and gloves too, they remind me of Frank Iero. 
But because I have to buy food and pay a rent now, I got just this bat choker. 
The other things are for my costume of Selene. My friend had Freshman Crowning Party yesterday, and with costume (theme was ancient art) you got cheaper ticket. I would probably go in costume even without it, I like dressing on theme :D.

I quickly made this moon thing, so someone could actually recognize me. It was kinda wonky, but it helped.

And bonus photos - I´m taking advantage of the fact it´s autumn, probably the prettiest season, so I can wear warmer tones. I usually wear black and feel very comfy in that, but October makes me want to colorise more :D. 
Sadly, since I´m on dorms, I´m still figuring good spots to place my camera and make good pictures. Also, even after almost 20 years on this planet, I still suck at posing.

I though maybe view from below will do it, but no. It was a bad idea, but funny experiment :D. I don´t think I will try it again. You can already see the regret on my face.

My granny knitted those leg warmers and I adore them!
 
I had a few job interviews and I´m going on first shift in a local bar, but I don´t think I will stick here. The owner is kinda creepy and if I already wasn´t sheduled, I would probably pass it altogether. 
See you next time!

Pieces to Spend A Rent On

 Hi!
As probably every lolita and/or fashion maniac can tell you

And as such, I love ogling the newest releases. Of course, I don´t really buy that much, but if I did, it would definitely be for those pieces.

Vampire JSK (Triple Fortune)

What can I say? It´s spooky season and I´m a Halloweeny bitch. I love everything macabre, but vampires are my favorite creatures of the night. 
I like the campiness of this JSK, the jewel colour and fact it actually does new thing - as much as I love cupcake cut, this reminds me of Halloween a lot more. I also like the bat hem of the neckline, and the fact it´s a bit lower. The fact that the spider web is an overlay and not a print also speaks to me.
Out of all colours, I like purple most, but would probably buy green. Honestly, if I ever see any of them on Lacemarket, I will get it. 
Also, is there any better dress to wear while listening to My Chemical Romance? It screams Vampires Will Never Hurt You. 

Edelweiss Cape Coat (Sheglit)

You know what else is kinda creepy and reminds me of vampires? 

Capes.
Long, flowy capes, where no can see what you carry and you can just dramatically roam around. And this one has it all. It looks very elegant, with its lenght, high neck and careful usage of details other than the lace bib. I think it comes nice together. Also, the hem is supposed to be 417 cm.
There is an ongoing Edelweiss series that as a whole looks very early Edwardian to me. I like this addition best so far, but I will keep an eye on it in the future. 
It comes in two colours, and I would definitely pick the black one. 

Velveteen Gips OP (Na+H) 

I will continue this thread of gothic pieces. Who doesn´t love a good velveteen? I used to have old school Meta velveteen OP, but I had no idea how to coord it or care for it, so I sold it. Ever since then, I´m looking for another smooth piece o my heart. This can be it. 
It´s rather simple, depending more on the cut and material, but it also has this choker, which definitely moves it to the edgier side. It kinda reminds me of victorian mourning dress. 
From what I saw, it only comes in black, but that´s perfect colour for such a dress.

Velveteen use Glen check setup (An Another Angelus)

While doing research for this, I kept thinking what does my favorite casual brand do? 
Turns out, still the same thing. I like all of their vintage tartans, tweeds, etc, it reminds me of autumn in Britain. 
Normally, you wouldn´t catch me dead in grey, but as a Downton Abbey fan, I instantly fell for this dress. The silhouette is just too cute. I don´t usually go for so... settled? clothing, but I really like this set. 

Now get ready for tonal whiplash. 

Berry Bunny Skirt (Emily Temple Cute)

I have no idea if this cut and length is even lolita anymore, but I have eyes and can see it´s sooo adorable. Not just the print, but the tiered cut and that little bit of lace that adds a nice finishing touch 

You can have this beauty in a variety of colours - pink, lavender, navy and ivory, and every single one has different berries and bows. I prefer navy and ivory with cherry and blueberry, but I can see myself in the summer, having picnic in every variant.
There is JSK and OP too, but this skirt has the strongest grip on me. 

Also, ETC is releasing Baby Chick series, which is exactly what sounds like. 
Tiny chickens living their best lives at least two cuts of OPs and skirt. It even has a little head scarf, can it get any cuter?

As for now, I saw it in pink, mint and yellow. It's up for reservation right now, so if you really like chicken/birds/underused animals in EGL, this is your time. Just be warned, in typical ETC fashion, the cuts have smaller poof, so it´s more of an otome thing.

The Good New Times

 Hi,

I missed blogging. I stopped doing it just for few months, as I tragically burned out at the ripe age of 19 (just kidding, I was just lazy), but I want to write again. 
A lot has changed in my life. I entered college, started to live in a new city and I try to work on making new friends, too. The last part is especially tiring, but it´s getting better, as all those new people turn into regular people. It makes things less awkward. 

I want to write about fashin (lolita, vintage, everything), films and sometimes my life too. So be welcomed everyone with some time to read through this!